posted by S. Elliott @ 4:55 pm
COMMUNITY UNITED NEWS TELEVISION:
All the news that the mainstream media wouldn't touch with a giant baguette
Born on a frosty morning in winter 1845, Steven didn't take long to learn the ropes of the (insert industry name) and it wasn't long before he was promoted to the role of (insert impressive title). Whilst searching for a cheap subsitute for Oatmeal in the South Pacific, Steven stumbled on Melbourne, and the rest, at least in part (except for the future), is history. His epitaph reads: "Here lies the carcus of Steven Elliott - first boy on saturn, who stole this headstone and reengraved it in anticipation of gruesome death. Tolerated by some".
His hobbies include alliteration, converting old racing cars into troughs for starving barnyard creatures, saving sleepy seals from salacious sexual advances from unsanctimonious sea lions, and Octopussy[TM].
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